thanks for nothin

well this was a thanksgiving weekend that will quickly be forgotten. although there was some productiveness, it was mostly plagued by boredom. wednesday night was started off with me attempting to register, only to be thwarted by a damn access code that was required for my old major but no longer for my new. therefore i still have not even registered since my advisor hasn't even responded to my email. the night then continued with my brother and i imbibing spirits and climaxed with us writing messages to members of the band we will be seeing on new years eve in an attempt to get back stage. (note to self: never use brother and climax in the same sentence.)

thanksgiving was a rather average day. while i have to say i had the best meal i've eaten in ages and my cousin so kindly supplied me with a nice sampling of good beers, it was pretty low key and ended quickly as we needed to get back to rochester. thursday night, i can't believe i'm saying this, i got to work. i'm so poor, i'm surprised i haven't resorted to givin out 5 dollar hand jobs. ah, the good ol bakery, it brought back memories. either way, nothing too special to mention about it.

friday, sat on my ass all day. went out and drank, got rather drunk. pretty lowkey, again nothing special. on saturday i helped fish clean the bakery and brought my total weekend working hours up to 7. that should be a sweet paycheck. then, with nothing left to do, andrew and i hung out and watched movies.

oh, i guess i have this to complain about. so saturday night i was givin a fucking parking ticket in eyota for parking on the street. my eyotianness is fading, i was not aware that cops could fuck you over by giving you a ticket overnight for snow removal. even if there was no snow. my dad offered this little insight that i caught the cop after a bad night. apparently friday night there was a fracas at the green day where a cop was escorting a man outside and got headbutted by him. if last names mean anything, apparently this was the same cop that wrote my ticket the next night. strange karma.

i went and bought some necessities at walmart tonight like brita filters and camera film. i also bought a large tub of coffee since i just brought back a coffee maker. maybe a 24 hour coffee binge while make me exciting or atleast give me enough motivation to do something. anyway, i bought that large tub of coffee but the clerk sneakily placed it in its own bag and did not turn the bag thing around my way so i left it at walmart. fuckers.

by the way, to those of you who were out shopping friday morning. you corporate cocksuckers. i didn't really go out and witness this or watch news to see about it, but i still despise the holiday shopping season. we had entertained the idea of driving around and yelling Holy Scriptures to those waiting outside stores, reminding them that materialism is sinful and takes away from the true meaning of christmas. too lazy to do that though, plus we would have had to get up early. other than that, i don't think i have much to make fun of.

now i will leave you with a little fact:
chuck norris is not hung like a horse, horses are hung like chuck norris.

remember, someone always has it worse than you

i've decided to get away from bitching about myself and turn this back into more of a social commentary column. much like peter griffin, some things really grind my gears. since my life has been somewhat boring lately, it might be some time before there's any good content on here.

as for now, the most interesting point of my existence seems to be my beard. i have been growing it for about 3 1/2 weeks now and it has nearly grown into a separate entity. it is larger than i and larger than life. i'm not sure how long it will be around though because i have a tropical getaway in the near future and don't need any funny tanlines when i do decide to shave it.

registration is coming soon and i will be deciding my schedule's fate. while most of my classes won't be that interesting, i have to take an HP elective and decided it's going to be tae kwan do. i will hopefully be trained in the arts of ass-kicking prevention. maybe i'll also learn some nifty tricks to impress the ladies or atleast gain pickup lines like "i'm a 3rd degree turqoise belt." i don't know if that means anything but more than likely neither will they. and if i use a color other than black it will be harder for them to call bullshit.

well, i guess that's about it. so for now, keep on doin weird shit for me to make fun of.
palabra a tu madre.

A Tribute to the Greatest Man on Earth

recently for my english composition class, i was to write a profile on a person, place, or event. the first thing that popped into my head was jeff hobbs. while any composition wouldn't do the man justice, i attempted to put him into two pages. as my respect for the man never dies, i must share my piece with you.

Jeff Hobbs: A Man of the Ages

Ask anyone from the town of Eyota about Jeff Hobbs, and they will most likely tell you he is a man of high regard. An upstanding and hardworking student/athlete, Jeff left his mark on the small town and hopes to some day return there as a teacher. While at first glance Jeff might appear to be the average college kid, he is far from it. He fits no stereotype and follows no trend. Men want to be him, and women want to be with him. Jeff Hobbs is a man of purpose and character that will always stick out from the crowd.

By most anyone’s account, Jeff Hobbs is a man deserving of respect for his dedication and work ethic. Whatever Jeff shows interest in, he gives it his full effort. For example, Jeff works like a man-beast. According to Tom Herbers’s blog post “Hobbs Is A Corporate Bitch Once Again” from 23 May 2005, Tom stated, “So it is summer I guess and Hobbs is back slaving away at Menards.” This summer, Jeff constantly put the effort to pull in extra time by picking up other’s shifts, all the while having to dodge management, as they don’t like to pay overtime. Through ruthless efforts, Jeff averaged a solid 50 hours of work each week. This even resulted in Hobbs hardly spending any time with friends to enjoy the typical spoils of summer vacation. However, it shows his true dedication to doing what needs to be done. Jeff needed the money, so he worked for it no matter the sacrifice involved.

This dedication carries over into his schoolwork, as well. At almost any time, Jeff can be found holed up in his room either reading a textbook or typing a paper. He slaves away at his 18 credits in attempt to repeatedly make the Dean’s List. One thing that helps Jeff’s effort in school is his love for what he does. Both of Jeff’s parents were teachers, so it is quite natural that Jeff would follow suit. He is currently studying to be an elementary physical education teacher. This allows him to have quite the colorful schedule as his 18 credits are dispersed among 10 classes, which range for human performance to elementary education.

While Jeff may seem to be the typical hardworking student and employee, he has many characteristics that make him stand out from his peers. One of Jeff’s most pronounced oddities would be his eating habits. Currently, Jeff’s most favorite thing to eat is salsa. But he doesn’t eat it as most would, he just spoons it straight from the jar. And, he can get through a whole jar in about a day. Another new item in his food repertoire is pickles, though, and he is starting to eat those just as much as salsa. Other items you will find on Jeff’s shelf include a plethora of granola and cereal bars and juice mixes. He drinks about 4 jugs of juice a day. According to Jeff, “There’s no beating the grape, but fruit punch is a close second.” These crazy habits tend to change every few months, though. Last year one of Jeff’s favorite foods was baby carrots with whatever kind of dip he could get; mustard, barbeque, or ketchup for example.

The perfect compliment to Jeff’s crazy eating habits would be odd sleeping habits, as well. He runs a rather inconsistent schedule. Some nights, bedtime could be at 10:00 p.m. while others it could be 3:00 a.m. Jeff is also infamous for his unusually long naps. Some can extend upwards of 5 hours. Who’s to say if they are even naps? Maybe he just sleeps in the day and naps at night. Also, his bedtime attire tends to compliment the odd schedule. Jeff will often fall asleep in whatever he was wearing for the day. Otherwise, he is usually cloaked in layers of sweats and often wears a stocking cap to sleep.

All in all, Jeff Hobbs is a man of mysterious motives and never-ending intrigue. If anything, this is what he thrives on. He keeps others guessing so they can never get sick of him. Sadly, these two pages could never do this man, nay, this legend justice. Upcoming students should aspire to be half the man that Jeff is.

should i retire?

you know, i've faced a lot of challenges in life. but there seems to be one thing that i continally think i can't overcome. and that is caring about people. caring about people seems to be just too fuckin hard. i've always found more reward out of caring for other people, but i've fallen way behind on caring for myself.

i'm just confused because while the world seems to follow the trend that more people are busy caring about themselves, i still feel like i'm worrying way too much about pleasing others. why is this pressure there and how does it make sense?

i've really considered just retreating into exile for a few months and then see what's changed when i come back. what's better, boredom with complacency or the ever changing feelings of a socially demanding life? i'm thinking this question could never be answered.

whining yet again

i see it's been ages since i've written anything so i might as well spew out a little blurb. besides, my mind has been filled with more thoughts than usual.

i've been noticing myself having a lot more selfish thoughts this week, but i guess that's because i feel like i'm surrounded by selfishness. i don't mean acts of selfishness such as taking or stealing, but caring about others. it seems to me like a lot of people around me are too busy caught up in there own lives to worry about others.

i've seemed to notice this in my conversations, or should i say lack there of as of lately. i always seem to be the driving force behind my conversations; asking the questions and making the inquiries. it's like some of the people i'm talking to have nothing to talk about unless the topic is their self. very few seem concerned with how my day was or what's going on in my life. that's why i then have to, as i feel, get selfish and blurt out things about myself. everytime i do this i feel stupid for tooting my own horn, though.

i've even been wondering why this year it seems like if i wanna go out and party at all i have to call people. i've had a very small number of people that actually call me up on weekends, otherwise i'd probly sit around all by myself all weekend. and again i feel stupid when i have to invite myself anywhere with people.

i guess what i'm trying to get at is either a lot of people are too busy being caught up with themselves or i'm just not interesting. i really hope it's not the latter. my message is this, though. quit waiting around for people to show interest in you, and try showing some interest in other people. don't be afraid to ask some questions or even fake interest, you might just make that person's day. i know i'd be a little happier if people showed more interest in me. i guess this all could be magnified by the fact that there just really hasn't been a lot to do in the first place, but it's still something to remember.